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The Contract You Accept When Having a Good Friend

The Contract You Accept When Having a Good Friend

Last week, I did a quick vote on my Instastories asking if you wanted a life post or a beauty post and 80% of you opted for another Straight Talk session – so let’s go!

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Social media’s quick release therapy has really encouraged a whole bunch of people to spend time bashing their negative acquaintances (trust me I have been guilty of this in the past!!)

However, the truth is that, most people have a good friend of some sort in their life that is sometimes neglected or even under-appreciated. I wanted to keep the positive vibes up by showing these silent heroes a bit of love, because I don’t feel like we talk about them enough.

We all want good friends but are people willing to proactively do the actions and things required to be a good friend themselves? Are you a good friend?

I often ask myself the question so that I can apply it to my relationships.  I’ll be honest and mention that I am selective with who I want to be a good friend to because I am not perfect and not everyone is deserving of loving lool.

I could write about this topic for hours, but below I have added qualities I believe are required to be a good friend:

You are willing to support your friend but may not support them all the time

The first point may be shocking but let me explain. Good friends are essentially additional support systems, they usually have your back when times are hard or you are engaging in a new adventure. I have serious respect for my friends that are ready to not support me, because they believe that they are protecting my best interests in the long run.

For example, what if I had a new business idea and the offering to consumers was terrible? I think a bad friend would encourage me to keep on going, whilst a good friend would say what needs improving and give me accurate feedback on how I could better address my offering.

Not everything is about business, I also respect friends that tell me when I am wrong in social situations. I know that I am a stubborn person and will justify my actions, but I will always look at a scenario through the eyes of my friend later down the line to understand or at least consider their perspective and learn from it.

Plus… I’m always a little suspicious when someone IS ALWAYS showering you in compliments.

You are honest

I mean this point pretty much explains itself – who doesn’t want an honest friend? I believe that you have to say the truth to your friend when you can. If that person breaks out into a tantum, then you will know that they are emotionally immature.

Remember, that there is a difference in being constructively honest as oppose to being brutally honest to break down your friend’s confidence. Honesty should never be malicious.

You accept your friend during the good times and the bad times

“Good vibes only!!”

It is a phrase that although it has positive sentiment really annoys me because it suggests that all your friends must be happy go lucky’s at all times no matter their current life situation.

My belief is that if I am a good friend, I will adore you when you are at your highest point but also adore you when you are at your lowest. (Although, I have been known to straight talk people depending on the situation).

People have moods and things that happen to them in life which means that as a friend you play a role in getting them back in to the right frame of mind and can empathise with their situation.

You do your best to help them

This is very simple. Society often congratulates a person that does THE MOST to help. Whilst I think that we should focus on the person that does the most with what they have. It is better explained with a hypothetical situation:

It is getting to the end of the month and you are broke, so you decide to turn to your friends for £40 to get through the month.

Friend A is financially successful and has about £500 to last them until the end of the month. Whilst Friend B is working a variety of jobs and has £65 to last them until the end of the month.

Friend A gives you £40 and Friend B gives you £20. Society will teach you to respect Friend A more because they have a lot of money and fully covered you, whilst Friend B only gave you half of what you needed.

However, if you look at effort, Friend A only gave you 8% of what they had so they were not even missing out on much whilst Friend B is clearly struggling themselves and managed to give you a third of everything they had with no problem – they were willing to put more on the line to help you out.

You understand your differences

This is another simple thing. You can sometimes agree to disagree. Good friends will always kiss and make up to make sure that everything is okay.

You only require their company and nothing else

Has a friend ever asked you out and the first thing you respond with “Who else is going?”.

Most times it is a genuine sign of curiosity but sometimes, it can be a person’s way of saying – if a whole load of people are not coming then I’m not coming. This sounds so stupid, but I use to get so offended when people said this to me at University – it was their way of saying I had a SUPER DEAD personality looool! If you are a good friend, then you only need that person in the room and they shouldn’t need any gimmicks for you to join them. Booze. Food. Money. And other gimmicks are nice extra’s. You simply need a friend that you can laugh with and be yourself with whilst having fun and creating dope memories.

I won’t embarrass you, but this one goes out to my good friends… you know who you are x Let me know what qualities you look for in a good friend in the comments below x

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